OMGWTFSD was that?!!!!!!

If your squeamish, I would skip this entry, just sayin’. So for lack of a better term let me paint you a scene that was well worthy of an entrance to a Saw movie. There I was, passed out and enjoying slumber when out of my dream of reliving through my first dog leg amputation surgery comes this screaching and screaming noise out my window. To be even more precise, I was mid use of a gigli wire saw my vet had just passed me in my dream,  using care to not move said saw away from the location we were cutting,  while slowly moving the handles in a back and forth motion (the vet tech in me feels its totally necessary for me to point out that the dog having said surgery was indeed one of my own, and that again, this is not for the squeamish). While I am cutting said humorous bone, this blood curdling, toe curling scream brings me to the most upright position, while nearly jumping off the bed, tapping PTSD husband’s shoulder going and asking “OMGWTF is that and why is it dying under our window?” Here’s the part that I admit, I am from the desert.  My folks live in a city that has populated enough to chase away most everything away but squirrels, prairie dogs,  and the equally nutty snowbirds. Here is a list of what went through my mind as the possible offenders while my husband was attempting to wake up enough to identify what set off the paranoid pregnant woman he’s married to. A) a small child is being attacked at 3:30 AM in my yard, despite me not hearing the tell tale creaky floors of my son getting out of his bed upstairs. B) The adorable neighbor who goes duck hunting all the time got a new duck call in and couldn’t wait to try it out, only for it to be horribly defective at 3:30AM and he somehow can’t hear how it sounds like something is dying.
C) Bobcats, Racoons, lions and tigers and bears, oh my, also of note at 3:30AM. (Noting a them yet?!) D) Someone literally is getting maimed under my window, AT 3:30 AM! Finally, while all this screaming is going on outside my window, and somewhat in my own head, Hubby says “oh it’s probably a pair of racoons fighting or something.” While he rises to check the windows, my protective superdog, Latigo is cowering underneath me trying to squeeze between my leg and the bed, as if to say, “oh Mommy, please don’t make me go with him to see what that is?! Please.” Husband lays back down, as I am now fully awake more so then after a fresh steaming cup of Espresso. Finally the screaming stops, I go upstairs to find that apparently my kid gets his father’s sleeping patterns and has successfully slept through the entire ordeal! For your listening enjoyment, I have found this this morning to include as to a quieter version of what I woke to, and subsequently was awake because of for an extra hour when I should have been sleeping.


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